Garland, TX

(This happened while working at my first job. It was a slow afternoon, meaning no one was taking tickets when people walked in because there wasn’t enough activity. Typically people know to just walk on through to their movie, as there’s plenty of space to do so. This particular incident happened while my manager and I were behind the concession, while the rest of the theater lobby was empty.)

Customer: There is no one over here taking tickets.

Manager: I know ma’am. You can go on through.

Customer: But there’s no one taking tickets!

Manager: It’s okay. Just go on through.

Customer: I don’t see why I gotta pay if no one is going to take my tickets. *grumbles off*

Manager: You’re going to see a LOT of that here.

Lighting Store

Ottawa, ON, Canada

Despite having a large lighting showroom, because of the high volume of products we carry, we often encourage customers to browse our many catalogues. 

Me: Well, it seems like we don’t have what you need here in stock.  I know that several manufacturers we carry do make a version of that item, though.  Would you like to take a look through some of their catalogues and see if we can order something for you?  It would take a couple of weeks, but then you’d get the exact look you want.

Customer: Yes, please.

*Customer proceeds to sit for over an hour, flipping through our binders.  I run back and forth the entire time, getting new binders, putting away old ones, and pricing out dozens of fixtures she finds interesting.  Finally…*

Customer: I REALLY like this one.  I think it’s perfect.  Can I see it in person now? 

Me: Unfortunately that particular item will have to be ordered from the manufacturer.  The only way we can take a look at it now is in the catalogue.

Customer: That’s ridiculous!  If you have it in your book, you should have it here!

Me: Well, you’ve seen that by looking through the books there are tens of thousands of lights available.  We’d have to have a warehouse as big as Raiders of the Lost Ark to hold them all!

Customer: This is stupid.  I’ll never shop here again!  What a waste of time! *storms out of the store*

Me: I agree.

Movie Theatre

N.B, Canada

I was selling tickets at the box office when this woman who appeared to be in her mid-fifties comes up

Me: Hey there! Which movie would you like?

Customer: World something.. how much is a ticket?

Me: World War Z? and a ticket is originally 11.99$ but it happens to be in 3D and playing in our Extra theatre, so with that surcharge, it comes to a total of 16.99$

Customer: (obviously dumbfounded) Wow! Well it’s a good thing my mother is dead because she would have a heart attack over those prices like I’m about to have!

She then left whilst I just stared in a state of shock

Coffee Shop

San Francisco, CA, USA

Me: Hi! what can I get started for you today?

Customer: I would like an extra dry, no foam cappuccino.

Me: So, a cappuccino is a foamy espresso drink. A dry cappuccino is mostly foam. A wet cappuccino has less foam, would you like that instead?

Customer: No! I want it extra dry, but make sure it has no foam.

Me: Would you like a no foam latte instead? A cappuccino, by definition, has foam in it.

Customer: Yes, okay, but make sure it’s extra dry.