Retail

Illinois

I’m working customer checking out two women when they inform me it’s a tax exempt purchase.

Me: okay, what’s the name of the orginization?

Lady 1: (church name)

Me: okay let me look up your state ID number

My manager was nearby and already found the number and begins to read it off

Manager (a bunch of numbers and letters are said and then) 6-6-6

After they leave I say

Me: that sister is going to go pray for our souls right now.  

restaurant

Chicago, Illinois

(I work at a casual dining restaurant, we’re generally very busy on the weekends and reservations are always recommended especially for large parties. Some people have a hard time understanding how reservations work.)

Me: Hi, welcome to [restaurant]

Guest: I have a birthday party here

Me: Ok, do you have a reservation?

Guest: Yes, it’s a birthday party.

Me: Ok, what’s the name on the reservation?

Guest: (becoming irate) It’s the birthday party.

Me: Alright, miss, but the name?

Guest: (sassily) How many other birthday parties do you have?

Me: ….Um, if I look at the notes on all the reservations…. it looks like we have…. three other guest celebrating birthdays tonight.

Guest: Well were the birthday party. They’re already here.

Me: I’m sorry, I haven’t seated a birthday party yet this evening. How many are in your party? Could the name be ?

Guest: Yes, isn’t that obvious? We’re the birthday party.

Me: Ok, I show that reservation for 8:30 this evening, not 7, so we would still need to set up your table.

Guest: But they’re already here.

Me: You’re more than welcome to have a look around, but I do not show that reservation as being seated.

(Thoroughly pissed off at me, she stampedes through the dining room, and then comes back to the other side to check the bar for her party. Leaving me with a glare she walks back to our wine tasting area. She comes back later at 8:30 with the rest of her party to be seated.)

Guest: We’re the birthday party.

Video Game Store

Boulder, CO, USA

I work at a well-known chain of video game stores. We sell video games and video game accessories, and nearly nothing but. It is also store policy to greet every customer as they walk in and see if they need any help.

One day, a very, very tall and gaunt man (I am not short at 6’4”, and he towered over me) walks into the store, with a girl who looks to be about twenty years his younger on his arm.

Me: Hello sir! May I help you find anything in particular today?

Customer: (In a thick slavic accent) Yes, I was wondering if you have charger.

Me: Chargers? Sure! For a handheld, or a controller, or..?

Customer: I need charger for this.

He produces from his pocket a small black cylinder. At first, I thought it was a motion controller for a popular system. Upon examination, though, I find that it is an electric face shaver.

Me: Oh I see. Well, this is a video game store, and we’re going to be specializing more in stuff for video game consoles. You might try (large retail chain nearby)?

He pondered this for a moment.

Customer: You have video game that have charger for this?

Me: Sorry sir, we won’t have a charger for your shaver. If I were you, I’d check (retail chain). It’s just down the road here, if you take a left…

Customer: (Suddenly rude) Yah, I know where is (retail chain).

He pocketed his shaver and left in a huff. This is probably the weirdest encounter with a customer I’ve had yet.

Restaurant

Canada

Employee (working drive thru): Welcome to ***** what can I get for you?

Customer (drive thru):  Can I get a flame thrower meal with a small oreo blizzard.

Employee:  Uh, this is *****, not Dairy Queen. 

Customer:  I want an oreo blizard and a flame thrower meal with fries.

Employee:  I’m sorry, Dairy Queen is on the other side of the parking lot.  This is *****.

Customer:  I can’t F****** hear you, stupid F****** drive thru!  *begins attacking the drive thru microphone/speaker and drives off*